* - * - * - * - * - * - * - * -

We walked to the sea, just my father and me and the dogs played around on the sand.  Winter cold cut the air, hangin’ still everywhere; dressed in gray, did he say hold my hand? ¹

Chris DeSoto sighed as he got out of the car.  He looked over at his father and wondered why there were here.  Here being the beach.  It was Mid December and colder than normal.  This was the last place he wanted to be, especially with his dad.

“Come on, Christopher.”  Roy DeSoto called after his fourteen year old son.  “The tide’s out, maybe we can find some shells.”

“Shells are for kids.” Chris grumbled.

“Don’t be such a grouch.” Roy put his hand on his son’s shoulder and cringed when he shrugged out of the grip, “Fine.  Let’s walk then.”

“What ever.” Chris started walking along the boardwalk and down to the beach.

“Chris?” Roy started, “We don’t talk anymore, Son.”

“So?” Chris shrugged.

“I miss the talks we used to have.  You used to tell me what you want to be when you grow up, and what you want from life.”  Roy sat on the sand and watched as the gulls flew over the water.

“I know.” Chris sat next to the older man.  He wanted to reach out, to hug his father, to be held by the older man.  He just didn’t know how to anymore.

* - * - * - * - * - * - * - * -

I said love’s easier when it’s far away.  We sat and watched the distant light.  We’re two ships that pass in the night.  We both smile and we say it’s alright.  We’re still here; it’s just that we’re out of sight.  Like those ships that pass in the night. ¹

“I miss those talks too, Dad.” Chris finally admitted.  He watched as a cruise ship sailed along the horizon.  That was followed by a Battleship.  “You think about it?”

“About what?”  Roy too was watching the ships.

“War, life, love, the world,” Chris shrugged.  “I miss her, Dad.”

“I do too, Son.” Roy’s thoughts again turned to the loss of his mother just three weeks prior.  “We all do.  And you know what?”

“Don’t say it,” Chris looked at his father then turned and squinted his eyes in the light from the setting sun. “Don’t say that it’s all right to cry.  Mom’s been telling me that for weeks now.”

“I know.  She’s been tellin’ me that too.”  Roy admitted.

“You?” Chris looked at his father.

“Yes, me,” Roy took off his sunglasses so he could see his son better in the fading light.  “I didn’t cry when my father died, Chris.  I was your age, and I thought it wasn’t manly to cry.  So I kept all that grief bottled up inside. In here,” He pointed to his heart, “I carried around a lot of grief and hurt after my Dad died.  Your mom helped me over it though.  She showed me that it was all right to cry, to feel grief, hate, what ever.  It took me years to get over his death.  Now it’s time for me and you to go through this together. I hope you’ll let me help you.”  Roy moved closer to his son’s side.  He placed his arm lightly over the youngster’s shoulder.  “You’re growing up so fast, I don’t see you enough.”

“I miss you too.  Why do you have to work so hard?”  Chris felt the sting of tears start.  He did so want to let out the pain he was feeling deep in his soul.

“Because I have to, Chris.  It’s so expensive raising a family these days.  Your mother’s had to get a job just so we can make the bills.  I’m up for a promotion next month; I think I’m going to take it.”  Roy hadn’t even told his wife yet about the promotion.

“Wow.  You made Engineer?”

“Better, I made Captain.”  Roy beamed with pride at his accomplishment.  “So did Uncle Johnny.”

“That’s great, Dad.”  Chris hugged his father then.  Long and hard.  He soon found himself crying.

“It’s okay, Son.  Let it all out.  I’m here for you.”  Roy held his son tightly in his arms.

* - * - * - * - * - * - * - * -

There’s a boat on the line, where the sea meets the sky.  There’s another that rides far behind.  And it seems you and I are like strangers, a wide ways apart as we drift on through time.  He said it’s harder now we’re far away.  We only read you when you write. ¹

Roy put the car into park and opened the door. “You coming?”

“Huh?” Chris looked out the window at the restaurant, “Yeah.”

They sat in a booth reading the menus deciding what they wanted.

“Is Uncle Johnny coming over tomorrow?”  Chris asked.

“I think so.  He’s feeling a little down lately.”  Roy admitted.

“Is Miss McCall still gone?”  Chris sipped at his water.

“She’s due back Sunday afternoon.  Maybe then Johnny’ll settle back down.” Roy giggled. 

“Right, like that’ll ever happen.”  Chris giggled too.

The father and son enjoyed a quiet dinner talking about school and work.  Reconnecting what seemed to be a lifetime of being  disconnected.

* - * - * - * - * - * - * - * -

The end

¹ Ships by Ian Hunter  was found on Ultimate Manilow.